Friday, October 07, 2005

Devil Monkeys II

Contrary to Don Quixote's fervid imaginings about devil monkeys reading fortunes (see previous entry), the truth is much deeper and darker too.

The Devil does send monkeys down to earth to do his bidding. In the case of Howler Monkeys, Lemurs and Macaques, the devils biddings has to do with environmental degradation and the extinction of species. That's right: Global Warming is being caused by Devil Monkeys - the Macaques specifically. Deforestation is the province of the Lemurs, damned devilish monkeys. And Melting Glaciers is caused by the piercing screams of the Howler Monkeys.

If the Devil has his way, and the Devil's Monkeys are successful, soon the earth will no longer be habitable and it will be the end of all species. The proof of this theory is the great extinctions of the past: The dinosaurs dying off 65 million years ago must have been caused by the Devil Monkeys since they were the only mammals that survived the catastrophe. And the Bison that went extinct on the great Prairies - Devil Monkeys.

Beware the Devil Monkeys.

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